Ask An Heiress: Bestfriend or Bestfriend’s Brother?

21 Jul

Dear BieberHeiress,

I NEED HELP! Ok so, I’ve liked this boy for about 3 years, and this year I had finally gotten over him…moved on and stuff. But then last night pictures of him showed up on my news feed on Facebook, and let me tell you…he looked cuter then I’ve EVER seen him before.  And just that night I was planning on going to the carnival with him, cause, get this – his sister is one of my best friends (she was going to come too)! She’s so protective over him & thinks that I sometimes just use her to get to him, but that’s totally not true! I convinced her that I didn’t like him anymore…and then I saw him & fell in love with him all over again. He’s so cute & sweet & hilarious, but my friend ALWAYS used to embarrass me RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM! Like she told him that I had a huge crush on him while I was sitting right next to him. It was so awkward & I was positive that he thought I was a complete freak & nothing would ever become of this stupid little crush.  Besides…I’m a freshie and he’s in 11th grade! Stuff like him liking me…it just never happens to people like me.  I mean..he obviously has girls HIS AGE who are gorgeous & I’m just plain old me.  But now…he’s all I think about. AGAIN. And I don’t know what to do…I LOVE my friend but I LOOVEE her brother. HELP? 😦
-A
Dear A,
We totally understand where you’re coming from with this, and as a matter of fact one of us had the same situation with a friend not too long ago. When you’re interested in the sibling of a friend, it’s hard to establish boundaries. When you’re sitting in your room talking to each other, is it okay for you to dote on her brother? When you’re talking about guys that you’re interested in, are you allowed to bring his name up? We understand that that’s an awkward situation for both you and her. It’d probably be best to sit down and talk to her about what she’s comfortable with and what she’s not. It could be that she fears being overshadowed by him if you two were interested in each other. And no girl wants to lose a friend over a guy, especially a relative. With that said, the bigger issue is figuring out how he feels. There’s one of two potential sentiments on his part: he either sees you as a little sister and is flattered yet unaffected that you like him, or he secretly acknowledges the fact that he could have feelings for you too. He probably will not come out and say anything, so if you sit down and clear the air with your friend, if the two of them are close, which it sounds like, she could probably give you some insight into how he’s really feeling. We wouldn’t worry about the age thing; two years is not a big disparity at all, plus guys typically don’t mind younger girls. Don’t stress too much about looks either. Sure, it’s normal to feel a little anxious about the gorgeous older girls he may know, but it takes a lot more than that to form an attraction. Plus, sometimes the “Girl Next Door” look/personality eventually pulls through and everything works out. So sit down with your friend, establish boundaries and let her know how you really feel, while trying to get a feel of how he feels too. Don’t set your hopes too high for potential, but don’t give up either. We have a friend who’s been dating one of our brothers for 2 years now, and he’s a freshman in college and she’s going to be a junior in high school. Good luck! Go for it A!
Love&Light,
BH.
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4 Responses to “Ask An Heiress: Bestfriend or Bestfriend’s Brother?”

  1. jasbajnsbs July 22, 2010 at 12:38 am #

    I love your blogs! bu I just don’t understand how you say two years isn’t that big of a deal and yet you make a big deal about Ryan butler and Sarah bayleat?

    • bieberheiress July 22, 2010 at 2:54 am #

      2 years and 4 years is a legitimate big difference…like 13 and 15 and 13 and 17 are COMPLETELY different relationship dynamics.

  2. random July 22, 2010 at 2:58 am #

    I think I would try to go for the brother if I had a crush on him for 3 years ya but it could be risky like if he said no I think itd be SUPER awkward being around himm for a while but eventually it would wear off. Good luck. I would say more but I’m ten and in 5th grade so I don’t know much about this dating crap but I LOVE this blog and I aspire to become a famed and adored writer of a successful fiction series

    • babyygir1 July 22, 2010 at 5:21 pm #

      ahahaah, yoou remind me of Lily Brennerhasset in Lily B. on the Brinkk(:

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